All Cried Out (All Falls Down Book 2) Read online

  All Cried Out

  Ayden K. Morgen

  Kindle Edition

  Copyright © 2015 by Ayden K. Morgen

  All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

  Edited by: Jayme Stephens

  Cover by: Jada D'Lee Designs

  Dedication

  To Melanie – Thank you for being my friend, one of my biggest supporters, and a beautiful human being.

  I love you.

  And to the Girls – Thank you for brightening my life with your insanity, hilarity, and friendship. Your shared desire to own a tank makes my heart go pitter patter. I love you all like crazy.

  A portion of the proceeds of this novel will be donated to the Polaris Project in loving memory of Cassie Mae Combs: 11/28/1980 - 11/27/1999.

  Table of Contents

  Prologue: So Close

  Chapter One: Rather Be

  Chapter Two: Finally Found You

  Chapter Three: Latch

  Chapter Four: Fuel to Fire

  Chapter Five: Freight Train

  Chapter Six: Lady in Red

  Chapter Seven: Airplanes

  Chapter Eight: Sedated

  Chapter Nine: Look After You

  Chapter Ten: Something I Need

  Chapter Eleven: So High

  Chapter Twelve: Cry

  Chapter Thirteen: The Domino Effect

  Chapter Fourteen: Words as Weapons

  Chapter Fifteen: Love Me Harder

  Chapter Sixteen: Lifespan

  Chapter Seventeen: Everything is Lost

  Chapter Eighteen: Lay Me Down

  Chapter Nineteen: All Cried Out

  Epilogue: I Could Not Ask for More

  Acknowledgements

  About the Author

  Prologue

  So Close

  Fury burns in his dark eyes, scorching me where I stand. His face is red, his temples pulsing with the force of his hatred. He looms across the room like a massive, wild animal… so fucking dangerous, I try not to breathe too deeply, hesitant to set him off.

  "You did this," he seethes, the crazed lights of his eyes intensifying as he glares at me. A muscle in his jaw ticks, spittle flying from his mouth. He's cracking, losing himself to the hatred he's spewed at me since I came through the front door. "It's all your fault!"

  I stand silently, my hands lifted to show that I'm not a threat to him in this moment. My heart beats loudly in my chest, her name pounding through me with every sharp pulse against my ribcage.

  Savannah. Savannah. Savannah.

  I'm dying to get to her, to protect her from this son of a bitch, but I can't. There's not a fucking thing I can do to keep her safe aside from what I'm already doing. And I'm terrified it's not going to be enough.

  The gun in his hands—my gun—is trained on me, unwavering as he stares me down, just waiting for me to make a move so he can end this. So he can justify in his mind that he's in the right here. I rushed him. I attacked him. He had to shoot me to defend his life.

  It's bullshit, of course.

  He came into my home uninvited.

  He tormented my fiancée.

  And if I make a move now, he's going to kill her.

  The one thing I never thought I'd want, I now pray for with everything in me: Please God, don't let her walk through that door.

  I can't lose her.

  Not now.

  Not to this son of a bitch.

  Not ever.

  "Let's talk about this," I say, keeping my voice calm and steady, trying to reason with him. To make him realize he's never going to get away with this. As soon as he pulls the trigger, his life is over.

  I'm an FBI agent. They'll annihilate him.

  I don't think he gives a shit.

  He's beyond rational, beyond caring.

  "Fuck you," he snarls as if on cue.

  I fight the urge to flinch as his voice reverberates around the room before slipping through the open window into the night beyond. I send up a silent prayer that the sound doesn't bring anyone here. That she stays in the mansion with the girls, pissed off and hurting. Crying because of me.

  Christ, I never thought I'd want that either… for her to cry because of me. But so long as she's crying, she's breathing. She's safe.

  Beautiful, sweet girl, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

  The thought that I may never get to say those words to her—that I may never get to make things right between us—kills me. She's my life, everything I live for, and right now, I'm not even sure if she knows that.

  "You destroyed my life," he says, recalling my attention. Spittle flies from his mouth again, wetting his lips. "You took everything from me!"

  I desperately want to remind him that he lost everything on his own. He destroyed his own life. I merely ensured his fall hurt as much as he deserved. But I don't say those words. As true as they are, I'm not stupid enough to get into all of that with him now.

  "I'm sorry," I lie instead, trying to placate him, attempting to buy myself some time. I'm not sorry for a damn thing I've done to him, but he's clutching my gun in his hands, and there isn't another weapon in sight. I need him off balance, just long enough for me to knock the Glock out of his hands and wrap my own around his fucking throat. He's not walking out of this room alive.

  He's not going to get to her. Even if it kills me, I'll keep her safe.

  Savannah, baby, I love you.

  He stares at me for a long, tense moment, and then he smiles. It's dark, twisted with hatred and anger. "I want her to see your body," he says, taking a step toward me. "I want to see the look on her face when she finds you and realizes you'll never kiss her again. You'll never fuck her again."

  A chill shoots through me, freezing me from the inside out as something perilously close to excitement ghosts across his face. The sick son of a bitch means what he just said. He wants her to find my body. He wants to watch her break into pieces.

  No.

  I'll rip him apart before I let him do that to her.

  "I want her to know that I did this. I took you from her. I won." He takes another step toward me, and then another. The gun doesn't waver. "She'll live the rest of her life knowing that she caused this when she let you ruin my life."

  I hold my breath, praying he keeps coming toward me. Six more steps, that's all I need. If he takes them, he'll be close enough for me to make my move. I can finally wrap my hands around his throat and squeeze the life out of him for threatening her.

  Adrenaline fires through me when he takes another step, pumping me up.

  My heart races, every nerve-ending in my body firing, preparing me to leap on him.

  "She'll beg me to kill her," he continues, growing more animated, as if the insanity he's spewing breathes life into him. As if the thought of tormenting my girl like that turns him on.

  I want to vomit at the thought, but I don't. I don't move. I don't breathe. I just wait.

  "When she sees what she made me do to you, she'll beg me to hurt her."

  Come the fuck on! I want to scream when he stops moving, far enough away to prevent me from launching myself at him. Far enough away to give him time to shoot before I can close the distance between us. Rage pounds through me, all that adrenaline demanding action I can't take. I've got one shot at this, only one… and for her sake, I can't fuck it up.

  "I can't wait to watch what that does to her," he says. "To see her rea
lize she'll never get her fucking fairytale. Instead of walking down the aisle to meet you, she'll be walking toward your casket. She'll know you're dead because of her. She won't care what I do to her then. I'm going to enjoy fucking her while she cries for you."

  The desire to kill him rages through me unchecked, rising in intensity at his taunt. My hands clench into tight fists. I lean forward on the balls of my feet, desperate to silence him as he continues on, telling me in lurid detail what he's going to do to Savannah when I'm gone.

  "Jared?"

  I freeze the instant her sweet voice sounds from outside the front door. He freezes too, the disgusting scene he's been painting for me dying on his lips at the sound of her voice so close.

  Too close.

  "Jared, I want to talk to you."

  No! I scream silently, terror raging through me when her voice sounds again. Please, no.

  She can't be out there.

  She just can't.

  "Jared, are you in there?" she says again, tapping on our front door.

  His eyes are locked on mine as he takes a step backward, silently daring me to call out to her. Daring me to say something to warn her, to beg her not to come through that door. He knows… he fucking knows I can't let her walk into the middle of this.

  And as soon as the words to keep her out leave my lips, I'm dead.

  Already, his finger is on the trigger.

  Oh God, baby. I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry.

  I feel helpless, completely eviscerated as I stand there, torn between two options that will devastate her. Every part of me needs to keep her safe, and I can't. If I open my mouth to warn her, he's going to kill me. If I don't… she's going to walk in here and he's going to make her watch him do it.

  I don't even care that I'm going to die. All I care about is what my death will do to her.

  All I can see is her sweet face, those beautiful doe-eyes wide as she smiles at me, so much love and hope and joy in her expression, it brings me to my knees. All I can hear is her voice, crying out as she shakes and trembles beneath me, her hair plastered to her face and my name echoing around us. All I can think about is her.

  Every beat of my heart is for her.

  I love her. Christ, I love her.

  And I can't save her from this.

  All I can do is keep her from watching him kill me, to keep her from living with that horror. I'd give her anything, but I don't want to give her this.

  I don't have a choice.

  No matter what you hear, don't open that door, baby. Don't come in here. Please, don't fucking come in here. I love you. I love you. God, I love you.

  The doorknob wiggles, turning.

  "Savannah, run!" I scream, diving toward her tormentor the second her name leaves my lips. "Run, baby!"

  A gunshot rings out.

  Pain explodes in my chest.

  My body crashes into his, dragging us both to the floor.

  Chapter One

  Rather Be

  You're late.

  I drum my fingers against the top of the heavy oak desk I’m propped against as I read Savannah Martin's text, frustration seething through me. Dragging a hand through my hair, I fire off a quick response, letting her know I’m still tied up at Talbot International and that I'll be there as soon as I can.

  "I’m sorry, Jared," Lexi Talbot says for the thousandth time when I shove the phone back into my suit pocket. She glances over at me from her spot behind the massive desk, chewing on her bottom lip. Guilt shines in her bright blue eyes. "I didn’t know this would take so long."

  "It’s fine," I lie, crossing my arms over my chest. It’s not her fault Drake Evans is stuck in traffic on I-280, but shit. I'm ready to get out of here. My brother is getting married, and I should have been there half an hour ago.

  Lexi eyes me for a long moment before sighing. "I wish you’d consider taking a permanent position here at T.I."

  "Lex-"

  "I know, I know," she interrupts, holding up a hand to stop me. Her blonde hair bounces as she shakes her head, her nose scrunching. "You don't want to leave the FBI, and you shouldn't. You're good at what you do. I’m just going to miss having you around here."

  "You’ve been without me before," I remind her, not commenting about my job with the FBI… if I even have one now. After everything that's happened since I took the Talbot case, I'm no longer sure where my career in law enforcement stands. Too many bodies hang over my head, piled up while I scrambled to find the culprit. I know I'm not just going to walk away from that scot-free. I don't think I should walk away scot-free.

  "This is different." She glances down at the stack of files in front of her, still chewing on that bottom lip, before her eyes meet mine again. Anxiety churns in her gaze.

  "You don’t need me anymore, Lex," I say gently. "Paulson’s gone. The anti-Balaka militias haven’t attacked a T.I. caravan in Africa in months. You’re doing fantastic."

  And I’m chomping at the bit to be done with this entire nightmare. It’s been almost six months since Lexi's half-brother, Stewart Paulson, murdered their father and eleven other T.I. employees, kidnapped my fiancée, and caused all of our lives to explode into chaos. I’m ready to leave those memories in the past where they belong and move on with my life. My girl, Savannah, will never say the words, but I know she’s ready, too.

  She can’t hide the anxiety in her gaze every time I leave the mansion with Lexi to face another bevy of reporters. Knowing I’m still dealing with the fallout bothers her, and the fact that half the staff of T.I. still holds out hope that Lexi and I really will end up together kills my girl. Forcing her to deal with that a moment longer than necessary is intolerable to me. I desperately want to close this chapter of our lives once and for all and give her a little peace of mind.

  After everything she's dealt with because of me, she deserves that much.

  Lexi sighs heavily and nods. "You’re right. I’m just going to miss you. You’ve made this entire situation tolerable. Without you here…." She trails off with a shrug before shifting her gaze back to the stack of manila folders in front of her.

  "What?" I ask, not liking the way she avoids looking at me. Before her half-brother murdered their father and tried to ruin her life, Lexi was a force to be reckoned with. She took no shit from anyone. I hate seeing her so uncertain, as if she still doesn’t feel entirely safe even now that Paulson no longer lurks in the shadows, tormenting her in his insane attempt to wrest control of Talbot International from her.

  "Half of the Board is waiting for me to screw up," she blurts, still not looking at me. "They’re waiting for a reason to vote me out and put Sinclair in my place. With you here, they wouldn’t dare. But without you… what if they’re right? What if I’m not the right person for this job, Jared?"

  I stand silently for a moment, absorbing her words and the hesitation behind them. The fact that she's so worried irritates me to no end. I want to bring Paulson back and kill him myself for the damage he's caused to the people I care about. Not just to Savannah and Lexi, but to Lexi's sisters—Katrina and Madeline—and to my brother, Chris. None of us have escaped unscathed. Even now that Paulson's dead, the ripples continue, damaging us all in one way or another.

  Reporters descended in droves the moment the full story about Paulson leaked six weeks ago. They're everywhere, demanding answers we can't give them. Lexi's fighting tooth and nail to keep T.I. intact. Her sisters are in therapy. Savannah still has nightmares. My brother will live the rest of his life with Paulson's death on his conscience. The son of a bitch deserved to die, but I hate that Chris had to be the one to pull the trigger. And I'm still trying to clean up the mess he left behind and protect the people who matter to me. I'd gladly give up my job with the FBI if it meant I could erase the last year and a half for the girls and Chris, but I can't.

  I may lose my job anyway.

  "Bullshit," I finally say to Lexi, staring down at her, certainty in my voice. "You’ve more than proved that your father made
the right choice when he chose you as his successor. And you’ll keep proving it because you love this company as much as he did and you’ll fight for it no matter what. If the Board doesn’t like that, they can go to hell. You were born to do this and they know it."

  Those who pretend otherwise are irrelevant as far as I'm concerned. They have their own agendas, and none of those have anything to do with what's best for the company. Despite everything the media has thrown at Lexi since learning of Matthew Talbot's secret son, she's stood her ground, refusing to back down or let the resulting scandal tarnish the company's image. Thanks to her, T.I. has begun funneling food and medical supplies into the Ukraine in the last several months, helping ease the impact of the humanitarian crisis there.

  Simply put: there is no one more prepared to fight for T.I. and what the company stands for than Lexi.

  She sits silently for several moments before she looks up at me again and nods, her shoulders going back. "You're right. I'm being silly." Some of the anxiety washes from her expression, replaced with steely determination. And then she smiles. "Besides, you and Savannah deserve some time away from all of this to focus on the wedding."

  The wedding.

  My wedding.

  My heart rolls in my chest at the reminder that Savannah will officially be mine in two short months. It can't get here soon enough. I never thought I'd want to tie myself to another person as badly as I do to Savannah, but I'm dying to put my ring on her finger and give her my last name.

  "You're glowing," Lexi teases me, laughing softly.

  I roll my eyes at her, unable to contain the grin spread across my face. Not that I'd even want to do so. I'm crazy about my sweet girl, and I don't care who knows it. Denying her while we dealt with Paulson damn near tore us both apart. I'll never do that to either of us again. Ever.

  "She glows too, you know."

  "Yeah?" I ask, my voice husky.

  "Yeah." Lexi smiles at me again. "Even with everything going on, she's ecstatic. I'm really happy for you guys, Jared. She deserves someone like you. After everything she's been through… I'm glad it's you."